For The N'th Time

And yet again
In these
274 days
And a week that
I've known you
Yet another goodbye
We try.

I know
I'll fail
Miserably yet again

For the day
I say goodbye
You loom
In my thoughts
And all I think of
Is my hand you held
Fingers intertwined
When I had just
When you had just
Gotten to know
A day before you left
As we walked
Up -down the beach

Our first goodbye.

I believe I didn't
Know you then
We trace back
That moment
You and I became
Us
Was it when we
Counted the stars
Or shaped the clouds
Or sang in the rain
In the middle of the sea
Or in drunken stupor
I touched you
In the dark.

Now I know
Every contour
Of your body
Of you.

And yet I say goodbye
Because I love you too much?
because I'm afraid
You would forget
What these
Nine months and a week
Has given me;
Has given you.
I tell myself
Let the embers burn
Let the sparks fly
Let it smolder
And in its heat
Within days that
Become months
And years
We'll find
Our way.

I fail
Miserably
Again
I'm not ready
For any goodbyes!!

21.06.07
12.41 am