RIP '23 year old paramedic'

Dear Mr. President's son and every other misogynist patriarchs (men, women & everyone in between)

Last night I had an epiphany
I figured what dented-painted means
I realised how dented-painted I am
Considering I woke up screaming from a nightmare
Bawling. Disgusted. Scared.
As I walk down my locality
Familiar shops
I get heckled by men 
And even though my brother is with me
All I can remember of the dream
Is the unwanted touch, my screams
And the look of desperation on my brother's face.

I am dented-painted.
I was dented as a child
As are a lot of women I know.
And some men too.
I have painted my thoughts
I have painted my memories
I have painted my body
I have painted my society
And yet with an overdose on the Delhi rape case
I wake up in the middle of the night
Wanting to rip my breast away
From my body
So that there will be no more denting.

I am dented painted.
So is my best friend, my lover
My colleague, my teacher
My therapist, my boss
My favourite author, the childhood friend
My sister, my sister-in-law
We are all dented.
Used. Banged. Damaged. Goods.
Most probably really young
When we were not 'soliciting'
As you would like to believe.

I am dented-painted,
Painted, because
The only reason I bravely walk the streets
Of any city I've lived in
Is because I believe what worst can happen
Has happened.
I'm dented yet again though
Because while I'm battling
My post nightmare insomnia
I stay awake to know that
Our 23 year old paramedic rape victim
Doesn't have it in her anymore to
Stay Alive.
RIP!

apocalypse

I live with a death wish
Today.
The world hasn't ended
And I realise I was looking forward for it to.
I live with blood-thirst
Today.
The stench of rusting iron
Rising in me wields daggers.
I desire apocalypse
Today.
I walk to it if it doesn't come my way.
Slit my throat, slit my wrist, bleed.
I cry murder
Today.
Even though murder
Wouldn't quench my need for justice.
I see my sisters rise
Today.
But I see innumerable
Hands ready to pull her down, shut her up.
I want justice
Today.
Slay my rapist, slay them who quieten me,
Slay my murderer, slay me for remaining alive.